Beautified Poison
by romeoharvey
Summary: A twist on a scene from Intoxicated. AU.


**Beautified Poison**

_Disclaimer: I don't own Law and Order: Special Victims Unit_

_NOTE: This takes a scene from Intoxicated and goes AU (most of the dialog is the same, but i took a few liberties when writing it, to conform with this story), because Legaspiweaver requested it._

_: Beautified Poison :_

"...Plead her out Casey," Melinda recognizes the voice of Detective Olivia Benson, who appears to be in a conversation with ADA Novak. Halting just inside the doorway, Melinda asks herself weather or not she should approach the two woman, deciding shortly that they look as if they too are here to get away from work.

"You just won it for us, why?", Casey inquires, confused at Olivia's contrary behavior.

Olivia tries not to sigh and let her dejected emotions known as she searches the room for anything she can direct the conversation to. A brief surge of elation fills her as she realizes the perfect distraction; politeness, because sashaying towards them is her long-time friend, and recently secret love interest, Melinda Warner. Needlessly standing up to pull out a seat, Olivia says in a voice so bright, both her companions immediately see right through it, "Melinda! Why don't you come join us?"

For her part, Melinda graciously accept her seat, greeting both of the woman she often works with, but feels she never sees often enough, "Olivia, Casey."

Smiling, Casey barely gets out the first syllable of Melinda's name before her phone screeches for attention. Checking the caller ID, she sends her friends an apologetic expression, which is received with understanding nods. Answering the call, she rolls her eyes as she hears the agitated voice, knowing that her boss wants her back at the office to work on a case, or two, or two hundred, hell, it's not as if she has a life or anything...

Picking up her briefcase, the young ADA bids farewell to Melinda and Olivia. As the pair watch her rush out, one is at complete ease, while the other is drowning into a panic attack, because even though Olivia had been grateful to see Melinda at first, now she's just afraid of being alone with her. Not because there's something particularly frightening about Melinda, just that Olivia's frightened she'll do something stupid, like buy her the wrong drink, or confess her true love, the latter being something she might never be able to live down if Melinda rejects her.

"_If? More like when..."_, Taunts the self-loathing part of her. Sneaking a quick glance at Melinda, Olivia feels her face flush when she meets questioning, and if she didn't know better, concerned eyes. But she does know a rough fact of her life; that no one can possibly love her, it's as if the... _stench_ of how she came to exist touches everyone she meets.

Only half speaking to Melinda, and half to the limitless demons of her past, Olivia blurts out, "My mother was an English professor."

Sneaking a look at Melinda, see notes that the other woman is listening; it's plain by faint tilt of her head in Olivia's direction. The detective doesn't know why, but she continues, "When I was sixteen, I started dating one of her students, he was a senior. He was twenty-one years old and he asked me to marry him, and I said yes because I wanted to get away from my mother. She found out and she told me that if I didn't stop seeing him..., that she'd have him kicked out of college. And I told her I was moving out.

She was halfway through a bottle of vodka, and she dropped it. It shattered on the floor, and... And she picked up a jagged edge of the bottle and..., she came screaming at me, 'I'll never let anyone else have you!'. And so, I kicked her..., hard. And them I kicked her again and she went flying across the room and into the wall, and slid down to the floor. I'd never hurt her before, I ran out. I was so afraid..."

Melinda silently observes her friend, wanting to reach out and comfort Olivia with a tight hug and soothing words, but she can't begin to fathom how Olivia feels about her, or what words exactly could be described as 'soothing'. So she does what's easiest; she highlights an important fact that Olivia seems to have neglected, "You didn't kill your mother, Olivia."

Anguished, Olivia says with deep shame, "I know what it's like to want to. That's how I know Simone Bryce, I called her back then, when she was a law student. She helped me survive it."

"Why didn't Carrie say something?", Melinda's curiosity gets the better of her before she can stop herself from asking.

After a pause, Olivia supplies her with an answer, "Because then the abuse becomes real. If you keep quiet..., you can pretend that it's not."

Olivia sounds so heartbroken, Melinda eyes well up with tears of sympathy as she thinks, "_To hell with insecurities!"_, and pulls the somewhat shocked detective into her embrace. It's enough to give her chills how fast Olivia's previously rigid body relaxes against her.

Having locked away her mothers' scornful voice in favor of Melinda's much needed warmth, Olivia emits a sound that's suspiciously close to a purr, earning an unseen, but felt, smile from her friend.

For what feels like a long time, and yet not enough time, the pair remain locked in that position, Melinda radiating her love for Olivia, whom, for once, is accepting it.


End file.
